A Not-so-Healthy Me
Since I have made this whole book writing thing a major endeavor of mine I have been a big fat slacker in terms of my health. I have pretty much taken a sabbatical from the health nut that I was/still am. The only thing I really have stuck to is being vegetarian. But I've been a very unhealthy vegetarian. And I've been a poorly rested person. Those are two things I still believe play the biggest role in a person's health.
My only excuse is that I have been desperately busy. On top of trying to get my first book ready to submit to a literary agent, I have been studying to pass my securities licensing exams. So I have sacrificed many things.
One is having a relatively clean house. It's not that I was the best housekeeper before, but I would reckon I am even worse now. I generally clean when I can't concentrate because the pile of dishes are bothering me too much, or Novan has no clean clothes to wear to school. That's hardly my main issue though, just a mildly annoying one.
I used to spend a lot of time cooking, and I made weekly visits to the grocery store, and I planned out my weekly menus. Eating healthy was at the top of my list. Now, partly because of budget restraints pending our RIA deal I mentioned in an earlier post, but mostly because I spend my time studying or writing/editing, I make meals that I am ashamed of like grilled cheese, scrambled eggs, pasta pasta and more pasta, rice and beans, rice and beans, and very few veggies. Ok so the rice and beans aren't so bad health-wise, but I'm rather sick of them. In any case, I haven't had the usual vibrant diet that I am used to. Dinner, I would say, hasn't been so bad. I have begun making more effort there once I finished the first drafts of all three books. But I hardly eat any breakfast, and lunch is an annoying interruption in my day and I usually fill my annoying grumbling stomach with something unhealthy like crackers and cheese, or toast, or the leftover crust pieces my kids leave behind from their PB&J. It's sad. It's really really sad. Yes, I feel like a slob a little. It is evidenced in my weight as well. I have lost around 7 pounds from my usual constant weight. People don't generally see weight loss as a bad thing. It's a shame though that that weight-loss has mostly occurred because I've starved myself-- not eating breakfast much and very little lunch.
The other thing, a big thing, is sleep. I used to swear by 8+ hours of sleep. Now sleep has moved down several notches on the priority list. There's simply no other time to get things done except in the middle of the night when kids and sometimes husband are asleep. That madness has toned down a bit since I finished first drafts. Editing is far less consuming so I seem to be able to convince myself to get to bed at a semi-decent hour now. Before, I was staying up until 2 and 3 in the morning on a regular basis and waking up at 7:30. That time took quite a toll on my overall health. I could literally feel the physical difference, and I experienced weird signs of my ill-health like odd heart rhythms at weird times, fatigue in my limbs, and feeling generally drained physically. Mentally I was and am better than ever. I have been on the high of my life getting those words on paper but I saw my sacrifice real-time. So while my sleep has improved a little and I cook a little more than I was during that crazed-obsessed woman period, I still have a general feeling of unwell. The most obvious thing is my skin which has been plagued with all kinds of zit-nastiness. I rarely got zits before but now I get them on a regular basis. The other regularly noticeable thing is headaches. I only ever got headaches if I spent too much time out in the sun. Now I get them every other day or so. Not migraines or anything but headaches are something I never had to deal with before.
Ok, so stop whining right? Yes, I definitely need to make a change here soon. I have to find some kind of balance because I am literally feeling like there are just not enough hours in the day. Why are there not more hours in a day??? I could really use a minimum of 2 or 3 more. I might be able to swing all this craziness at once then.
There are two things I have learned through this whole process though. You are what you eat and what you eat has a definite impact on your health. I have probably shortened my life span or something just by abusing my body the way I have these past 3 1/2 months. The other thing is that passion and zeal for what you do has a way of making bodily ills seem inconsequential. I wouldn't go back and change any of the past months. I know that my current poor health is not permanent, but I have to say that I would give it up permanently in exchange for a life as fulfilled as I have had in these past months. Give me my writing, my new appreciation for myself, seeing my kids in a new light and appreciating my husband the way I have these past months and you can keep my former perfect health.
Good thing I don't actually have to do that... but I'd sure be willing if that sacrifice were really necessary. As it stands, I just have to figure out how to get more hours in the day....
On a totally unrelated note, I have to share this conversation I had with Novan:
I cleaned Novan's room today, putting all his toys back in the toy-box, etc.
This evening, I hear Novan grumbling to himself in the other room: Where's Optimus' other leg? I don't know where it is...
Novan appears in the kitchen where I am folding laundry and says: I don't like cleaning.
Me: Me neither Novan. Yet, somebody's got to do it.
Novan: I don't like it when you clean my room. I can't find my Transformers.
Me: (laughing) Oooooh.You find them better when they are all over the floor?
Novan: Yes mom. I don't like cleaning. Can you not clean my room anymore?
You got it kid. Note to self: Next time make Novan clean the room, that way, he knows where he put his own toys.
My only excuse is that I have been desperately busy. On top of trying to get my first book ready to submit to a literary agent, I have been studying to pass my securities licensing exams. So I have sacrificed many things.
One is having a relatively clean house. It's not that I was the best housekeeper before, but I would reckon I am even worse now. I generally clean when I can't concentrate because the pile of dishes are bothering me too much, or Novan has no clean clothes to wear to school. That's hardly my main issue though, just a mildly annoying one.
I used to spend a lot of time cooking, and I made weekly visits to the grocery store, and I planned out my weekly menus. Eating healthy was at the top of my list. Now, partly because of budget restraints pending our RIA deal I mentioned in an earlier post, but mostly because I spend my time studying or writing/editing, I make meals that I am ashamed of like grilled cheese, scrambled eggs, pasta pasta and more pasta, rice and beans, rice and beans, and very few veggies. Ok so the rice and beans aren't so bad health-wise, but I'm rather sick of them. In any case, I haven't had the usual vibrant diet that I am used to. Dinner, I would say, hasn't been so bad. I have begun making more effort there once I finished the first drafts of all three books. But I hardly eat any breakfast, and lunch is an annoying interruption in my day and I usually fill my annoying grumbling stomach with something unhealthy like crackers and cheese, or toast, or the leftover crust pieces my kids leave behind from their PB&J. It's sad. It's really really sad. Yes, I feel like a slob a little. It is evidenced in my weight as well. I have lost around 7 pounds from my usual constant weight. People don't generally see weight loss as a bad thing. It's a shame though that that weight-loss has mostly occurred because I've starved myself-- not eating breakfast much and very little lunch.
The other thing, a big thing, is sleep. I used to swear by 8+ hours of sleep. Now sleep has moved down several notches on the priority list. There's simply no other time to get things done except in the middle of the night when kids and sometimes husband are asleep. That madness has toned down a bit since I finished first drafts. Editing is far less consuming so I seem to be able to convince myself to get to bed at a semi-decent hour now. Before, I was staying up until 2 and 3 in the morning on a regular basis and waking up at 7:30. That time took quite a toll on my overall health. I could literally feel the physical difference, and I experienced weird signs of my ill-health like odd heart rhythms at weird times, fatigue in my limbs, and feeling generally drained physically. Mentally I was and am better than ever. I have been on the high of my life getting those words on paper but I saw my sacrifice real-time. So while my sleep has improved a little and I cook a little more than I was during that crazed-obsessed woman period, I still have a general feeling of unwell. The most obvious thing is my skin which has been plagued with all kinds of zit-nastiness. I rarely got zits before but now I get them on a regular basis. The other regularly noticeable thing is headaches. I only ever got headaches if I spent too much time out in the sun. Now I get them every other day or so. Not migraines or anything but headaches are something I never had to deal with before.
Ok, so stop whining right? Yes, I definitely need to make a change here soon. I have to find some kind of balance because I am literally feeling like there are just not enough hours in the day. Why are there not more hours in a day??? I could really use a minimum of 2 or 3 more. I might be able to swing all this craziness at once then.
There are two things I have learned through this whole process though. You are what you eat and what you eat has a definite impact on your health. I have probably shortened my life span or something just by abusing my body the way I have these past 3 1/2 months. The other thing is that passion and zeal for what you do has a way of making bodily ills seem inconsequential. I wouldn't go back and change any of the past months. I know that my current poor health is not permanent, but I have to say that I would give it up permanently in exchange for a life as fulfilled as I have had in these past months. Give me my writing, my new appreciation for myself, seeing my kids in a new light and appreciating my husband the way I have these past months and you can keep my former perfect health.
Good thing I don't actually have to do that... but I'd sure be willing if that sacrifice were really necessary. As it stands, I just have to figure out how to get more hours in the day....
On a totally unrelated note, I have to share this conversation I had with Novan:
I cleaned Novan's room today, putting all his toys back in the toy-box, etc.
This evening, I hear Novan grumbling to himself in the other room: Where's Optimus' other leg? I don't know where it is...
Novan appears in the kitchen where I am folding laundry and says: I don't like cleaning.
Me: Me neither Novan. Yet, somebody's got to do it.
Novan: I don't like it when you clean my room. I can't find my Transformers.
Me: (laughing) Oooooh.You find them better when they are all over the floor?
Novan: Yes mom. I don't like cleaning. Can you not clean my room anymore?
You got it kid. Note to self: Next time make Novan clean the room, that way, he knows where he put his own toys.
Comments
Post a Comment