Football
Dear Mr. football,
I write this to express my love and appreciation for the joy that you bring so many but also to express my frustration at not being able to love you as I would like. My husband spent hours with you throughout college, many hard hours with blood, sweat, and probably tears from time to time, probably vomiting after running drill after drill. He loves you and at times I must say I am jealous. Instead of anger though I tried to understand you, tried to see you as he does. I have tried to understand your many intricacies and tried to feel the energy that a crowd of thousands creates in a full stadium. My husband likes to have parties that celebrate your games:
I wish I felt like partying when I watch you.
Oh why are you so slow to watch? Why are there so many pauses and stops? Why are the players each doing something different so that it's hard to keep track of? Oh how I wish I could get as excited as these guys watching TCU vs Boise State:
I wish I could feel like outfitting myself in my favorite team's regalia:
I wish I could say "WE scored a touchdown!" or "WE are gonna beat this or that team!" even though I am not even on the team, just cheering those that are playing on a TV far away without feeling stupid. I wish I could yell at the TV like so many and actually think that it will make a difference to the game. I wish that I could love you....
But I just can't. I just don't enjoy watching you. You are confusing, you are slow, you are complicated, you are waaaay too long. Why are you even called FOOTball when maybe only 1% of the game involves a foot touching a ball? You have too many rules and I have too little brain capacity available for you. What will I do when one of my sons wants to play you? Can I love you then? I sure hope so.
Sincerely yours but only by marriage,
Rachel, wife of football fanatic extraordinaire.
I write this to express my love and appreciation for the joy that you bring so many but also to express my frustration at not being able to love you as I would like. My husband spent hours with you throughout college, many hard hours with blood, sweat, and probably tears from time to time, probably vomiting after running drill after drill. He loves you and at times I must say I am jealous. Instead of anger though I tried to understand you, tried to see you as he does. I have tried to understand your many intricacies and tried to feel the energy that a crowd of thousands creates in a full stadium. My husband likes to have parties that celebrate your games:
I wish I felt like partying when I watch you.
Oh why are you so slow to watch? Why are there so many pauses and stops? Why are the players each doing something different so that it's hard to keep track of? Oh how I wish I could get as excited as these guys watching TCU vs Boise State:
I wish I could feel like outfitting myself in my favorite team's regalia:
I wish I could say "WE scored a touchdown!" or "WE are gonna beat this or that team!" even though I am not even on the team, just cheering those that are playing on a TV far away without feeling stupid. I wish I could yell at the TV like so many and actually think that it will make a difference to the game. I wish that I could love you....
But I just can't. I just don't enjoy watching you. You are confusing, you are slow, you are complicated, you are waaaay too long. Why are you even called FOOTball when maybe only 1% of the game involves a foot touching a ball? You have too many rules and I have too little brain capacity available for you. What will I do when one of my sons wants to play you? Can I love you then? I sure hope so.
Sincerely yours but only by marriage,
Rachel, wife of football fanatic extraordinaire.
HAHA! I feel ya, I've never been able to get into football. However, I do love it when people want to celebrate..it's an excellent exuese to eat yummy fattening foods!
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